Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Yes! Danny Gokey Sucks!

Last night's theme for the Top 4 was the very broad & very awesome Rock Week. I didn't make a "Here's what they should sing!" post because I wasn't even sure where to begin. Though I'd like to think I would have requested that Adam sing Bowie, Queen, Zepplin, Radiohead, etc and that Allison sing Heart or Joplin and that Kris sing something folk rocky or The Beatles...though for SURE not the song he chose and that Danny Gokey shut the hell up and go home. Which hopefully he will do tonight!

Every week I look forward not only to Idol, but to EW's Idol recap. Michael Slezak always seems to be on the same page as me, and this is why I love him. Here's a bit that pretty much explains how I felt last night,

Shall we tally [the "heinous crimes" committed last night] Danny Gokey garroted a defenseless Aerosmith tune till its tongue lolled purple and bloated from its mouth. Kris Allen was casually hurled under the bus by a band of vicious imbeciles. Simon Cowell repeatedly vandalized his own reputation and hacked away at the last remaining threads of credibility that Idol possesses. Kara DioGuardi committed a lewd act, not to mention multiple counts of first-degree stupidity. And with their flawless, episode-ending duet, Allison Iraheta and Adam Lambert stole the show.

Because SERIOUSLY??!!?! The judges REALLY disappointed me last night. I didn't understand WHAT was going on. Kris was better than Danny. Like, way better. Should he have chosen a different song? Probably. But he still SOUNDED GOOD. WHICH DANNY DID NOT. HELLO!?! I can't even imagine how Danny's craptastic cover of Dream On would sound good in the studio recording and EVERYTHING sounds better in the studio recording. Ugh, it was just awful. Yet Simon says "You're safe" and Paula says "A+ for effort." WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?! Danny gets points for picking a song he has no business singing and trying to be like Adam and Kris gets thrown under the bus for trying to pick a song that suited him the most, doing everything he could to make it his own even though they weren't allowed to rearrange this week!? WHAT IS HAPPENING. So help me, if Kris goes home this week. To experience the absurdity first hand (or semi-first hand) check out this transcript of the judges critiquing Danny.

For that matter, Allison doesn't deserve to go home either. I thought she sounded amazing, as always, and that duet with Adam was AWESOME. Wouldn't have picked that song for them, but it was still really fun and nice to see after the awkwardness that was Kris & Danny's duet. P.S. didn't Kris seem really upset throughout the whole show last night? Why was that? Lack of confidence? Thought he was going home? Or did something happen right beforehand that jolted him? Was he sad he didn't get a dress rehearsal? Made me sad. I love Kris. Swoonz.

Woohoo! Just read this on Slezak's post. Slezak, let's be friends,

(What a contrast to the utterly chemistry-free and time-wasting pairing of Danny and Kris on the thematically dubious ''Renegade.'' The whole affair was such a non-starter, the only significant note I took on it was to note the fury in Kris' eyes when Simon blithely (and incorrectly) decided he'd been outsung by a showboating Danny.)

Thank you.

So close the top three we've all wanted for 8 weeks we can taste it! Allison, Kris, Adam. Allison, Kris, Adam. Just repeat it enough and it will happen. Go home, Gokey! GO GO GO HOME, GOKEY. 

I'm really into American Idol this season...

Now, for the round-up! 

My pick for worst: Danny

Slezak's pick for worst/going homet: Danny

EW reader's pick for worst/going home: Danny

Dial Idol's guess for going home: Allison

MTV's guess for going home: Kris

My pick for going home: Terrible fear it'll be Kris or Allison, pulling for Danny. GO HOME GOKEY.

Watch for yourself!