Friday, April 30, 2010

Get Back In Your Book [Photo]

The rest of the set, from Lissy Elle, can be found here See full post

Lost Alphabet, Edward Gorey Style

If you don't watch Lost, turn away now, BIG TIME SPOILER ALERT for everything up until now

TOR has written a poem about Lost in the style of Edward Gorey aka it's describes the death of 26 characters, in alphabetical order. Fuckin badass. Check out the beginning of the alphabet below, then click through for the rest!

The rest can be found by you clicking HERE! See full post

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


Picked up the May calender for the Egyptian & Aero Theaters today and came across some evenings I WANT TO GO TO, which you should want to go too or you CRAZY. Book ending the month in which Lost comes to a close (I have...a sort of one track mind?), are the following,

Saturday, May 1 – 5:00 PM - Egyptian

Triple Feature: 25th Anniversary! BACK TO THE FUTURE, 1985, Universal, 117 min. Dir. Robert Zemeckis. Michael J. Fox plays teenager Marty McFly, whose mentor Doc Brown (Christopher Lloyd) invents a time-traveling Delorean that takes the slacker back to the 1950s. When he inadvertently gets in the way of his teenage parents' relationship, Fox has to figure out how to get them back together to ensure his own eventual existence.

BACK TO THE FUTURE PART II, 1989, Universal, 108 min. Dir. Robert Zemeckis. A series of complex time-travel complications send hero Marty McFly and partner Doc Brown back to the 1955 of the first film after a mishap in 2015 generates a parallel universe.

BACK TO THE FUTURE PART III, Universal, 1990, 118 min. Dir. Robert Zemeckis The final installment starts off with McFly receiving a 100-year-old letter from Doc Brown, who is now happily living in the Wild West. Some historical snooping reveals that Brown was killed a mere week after writing his missive! Time to reignite the Delorean, save his partner and get back to the future. Claudia Wells to appear for discussion between I and II.

 Buy Tickets

Sure, some of you may not be soooo into Back to the Future Part III, but some of you probably weren't into Return of the Jedi either and Return of the Jedi looks pretty damn good next to the .... dare I say it ... new Star Wars trilogy ... ugh.... Whatever, the third BTTF is still super fun and it's still Marty and Doc and STFU WHATEVER. The first two are so good and the first one is a perfect film. I SAID IT.

Saturday, May 29 – 5:00 PM - Aero

Triple Feature: RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK, 1981, Paramount, 115 min. Archaeologist Harrison Ford battles occult-obsessed Nazis and former girlfriend Karen Allen as he attempts to save the Ark of the Covenant. Brilliant, non-stop adventure from director Steven Spielberg and producer George Lucas.
INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM, 1984, Paramount, 118 min. Dir. Steven Spielberg. This time we find Jones fleeing Shanghai and attempting to help free a village’s children from indentured servitude to a maniacal cult. Before the last reel unspools, Jones will fight for survival in the nefarious Temple of Doom.

INDIANA JONES AND THE LAST CRUSADE, 1989, Paramount, 127 min. Director Steven Spielberg returns for the third entry in the series with Indiana (Harrison Ford) searching for his father (Sean Connery) after the brilliant archaeologist is kidnapped by the Nazis.
Buy Tickets

The only thing better than a triple feature of the Back to the Future Trilogy? And slightly less awesome than a triple feature of the original Star Wars Trilogy? The Indiana Jones Trilogy!! WEEEE! Again, this trilogy features one movie that not everyone loved - Temple of Doom - but I saw that movie at least ten times before I saw Raiders or Last Crusade, SO, I love it, and calm down, it is, dare I say it, better than Crystal Skull? (Answer: Yes) See full post

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

American Idol Top 6 - Shania Twain Not A Terrible Idea After All?

 I was skeptical about this Shania Twain business, but you know what? I take it back. Everyone improved tonight. Does that mean I suddenly like Aaron Kelly and think he deserves to be in this competition? Absolutely not. Also? Mamasox continued to prove that she's a fuckin badass. ONWARD!

Lee - Still The One
Confused by how he is singing this. Off key? Or just weird? Still not a HUGE fan of his voice, but actually it's not terrible. And his look continues to grow on me. Not sure he needed the whole orchestra to come in. Kinda killed the whole "Lee making it his own" vibe for me. But still solid overall.
Step sideways - Still solid
Randy - One of his favorite songs of all time. Started out pitchy, but mid-way, found a way to make it his own & found his sweet spot
Ellen - Better than a pretty good job. Always makes it his own. Never a sound alike. Couldn't look cuter.
Kara - Sound of his voice makes it sound so relevant. Liked how he was feeling the song. Good job.
Simon - Agree with everyone. Absolutely the perfect song for him.

I just decided Lee looks kind of super sexy tonight. Did someone get laid between last week and now? .... What?

Mike - It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing
He can definitely sing. Probably Definitely my favorite tone of the remaining guys. Not sure I'm a fan of the arrangement, but Mike *always* sounds great and tonight is so exception. And he definitely made it his own, very him. He even made Shania Twain cry!
Step Forward
Randy - In the zone
Ellen - Felt like Luther Vandross, felt his emotion, beautiful
Kara - Always feels his connection to his songs, what she appreciates most. Melody is so beautiful and loved that he didn't change it TOO much, but changed it enough to put his mark on it
Simon - Agrees about Luther Vandross analogy, spot on. But performance was a little bit "wet". Randy doesn't know what Simon means. No one does. Simon clarifies that he means it was a little bit girlie. Um...okay, Simon.

Sidenote: When Shania Twain speaks, she sounds like she is French. That is all.

The rest after the jump!

See full post

Real Princesses Pack Heat [SWAG]

Ladies! Do you take offense at being thought of as a damsel in distress? Are you tired of waiting around to be saved? Well EFF THAT NOISE. We agree with you!

 This design is now available in our CafePress store! Did you know we have a CafePress store? We totally do. Anyway, this design (sans watermark) is available as both a sassy white tank and an organic blue or pink tee. We kinda dig it.

And I made it and stuff, so that's neat too. See full post

M.I.A. is Not Messing Around [NSFW]

M.I.A.'s new video for Born Free (the first single off her upcoming, untitled album) is seriously disturbing. And you seriously need to watch it. Although the video is not any more graphic than many of the films we review on this blog, I still need to warn you that it's not easy to watch.

Having lived in both a Western nation and a war-torn country (Sri Lanka), M.I.A.'s music has always reflected her own hybrid identity. Her music has always been political but her music videos have never been so graphic or blatant in their political statements, until now. Please follow the link below to watch Born Free. Also, the track (which is great too) is now available for download on iTunes. You can read more about M.I.A.'s new video and her recent Twitter escapades here.

Watch The Video

Editor's Note: The video was pulled from YouTube this morning due to its graphic violence, but here it is from Vimeo

See full post

Monday, April 26, 2010

Event: Women In Games International (WIGI) event at LA Film School 4/28/10 @ 7pm!

Check out WIGI event at LA Film School on April 28th at 7pm!

Who: Women In Games International. (
What: A panel discussing entitled: “Your Evolving Career in Gaming: How to stay relevant, stay in the game, and switch to other gaming arenas”
When: Wednesday, April 28, 2010 at 7pm.
Where: LA Film School, 6363 West Sunset Boulevard, Los Angeles, CA 90028-7317
Why: This program is part of WIGI's mission to "create a community interested and engaged in the gaming industry." AND b/c it's awesome!
How: ... hmm, don't think I have an answer for this one. So just show up, WIGI's event are always worth it! Esp since it's free.

Expect "Drinks, Learning, Community".
If you're under 21 don't worry, still show up! The discussion will take place at LA Film School. Afterward we'll socialize until we get kicked out. At that point we'll move to BoHo for 1/2 price drinks. So if you're under 21 make sure you get all your smoozing in we leave out.

Check out the confirmed speakers:
Alana Chan
Lead Producer
Disney Interactive Media Group

Kamalina Evans
Global Talent Acquisition
EA Interactive

Mark Vulcano
Studio Animation Director
Heavy-Iron Studios

Paul Cunningham
Co-Founder / CEO

Shannon Henry
Manager, Talent Acquisition
Sony Computer Entertainment America LLC

All are welcome (that means men too :-p )

See full post

Saturday, April 24, 2010

We All Have Hopes & Dreams


[The Daily What] See full post

Lost Actors In Their Soap Days [Jeff Fahey Was ATTRACTIVE Alert]

Okay, so because I've gotten back into Soaps recently (don't you judge me) I decided to subscribe to Soap Opera Digest again cause it's like 15 bucks for 52 issues or something ungodly like that. And *already* it's worth it, because this week, SOD featured two pages worth of Lost actors on SOAPS. Meaning, a photo of Jeff Fahey being attractive and Nathan Fillion being a tiny person. Scans below so you can see for yourself.

See full post

Friday, April 23, 2010

Things That Piss Me Off [Rant]

(Yeah, thats $236.48 EACH for $77 tickets)

Excuse me while I go punch a wall for not buying the first tickets that came up, even though they were shitty seats. I'm much more willing to pay 77 for the worst seats in the orchestra than I am to shell out 125 each for the balcony. Fuckity fuck poop. And while we're on the matter, what kind of heartless, money grubbing terrible person buys EIGHT seats to a once in a lifetime event like this, taking them away from fans who were on Ticketmaster RIGHT at 10am (for some people, it was sold out as soon as they tried to get tix) so they can sell them to these same people for a 300% mark-up? Basterds. This bites. See full post

Get Clean The Geeky Way [Want]

Yes, you see right. That's some badass Star Trek soap right there. And the fun doesn't end with that!

I KNOWS, RIGHT?!?!!?!? Plus they're all like under 5 bucks, which is some kind of magical. I think Ima get a nintendo and a batman and a star trek and a star wars and YOU CAN'T STOP ME, SMEE. DON'T TRY TO STOP ME.

Buy zem for yourself here.
Hat Tip: @GenJadeShade See full post

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Greatest So Say We All Shirt Yet [T-Shirt Of The Day]

How the eff did this fly under all of our radars? Did someone post about this and I just missed it in the insanity that was last week? From the guys over at Hijinks Ensue, who brought you this:

Comes this new shirt, commissioned by Olmos Productions to:
commemorate the historic meeting between the cast of Battlestar Galactica and delegates from the United Nations in Geneva, Switzerland in April of 2009 in which an impassioned speech from Edward James Olmos (Admiral William Adama) resulted in the UN reconsidering its stance on using the word "race" as a cultural determinant.

Um. So. Yeah. It's $20 and you can buy it here. If you're not considering buying it, I doubt your standing as a true Battlestar Galactica fan. In fact, IS ANYONE ELSE SORT OF TEARING UP RIGHT NOW? No? Just me? Cool. See full post

Some "Never Seen Lost" Genius For You

"It’s also clear this week that this is all a set up for the different spin offs ABC has planned for it’s fall line up.  Here is the list:
  • Miles and Sawyer star in a crime drama called “Not Without My Sawyer”.  Kate guest stars as a former crook turned informant. Alternate title: “A Miles in his Shoes”
  • Claire stars in a dramedy called “Up Over” (instead of Down Under) about a single Australia mom learning about life and love in Los Angeles. It’s a heartfelt comedy with heartfelt laughs.  Desmond plays the love interest.  Claire thinks they could never be more than friends.
  • Sun and Jin star in a female-scaling-the-corporate-ladder drama called “The Rising Sun”.  It’s about how Sun has to fight against stereotypes and tradition to be the breadwinner in her family and coping with Jin’s mixed support and jealousy.  Think Ally McBeal but not funny.  So just like Ally McBeal. Zing!
  • Linus and Locke star in a TV version of the movie “Stand By Me”.
  • Jack stars in the medical dromcom (patent pending) “Neuroses”.  He’s a single dad and successful surgeon.  He seemingly has it all.  Except love.  Kinda like Gray’s Anatomy ate the Deep End washed it down with some ER then had House for dessert"

    Full Recap of this week's episode at Never Seen Lost Blog  
See full post

A Hot MALE Character In Fable III?!?!?!

Please allow me to be totally & completely superficial for a moment. If you've played Fable II, you know the game specialized in making super hot girls but fugly beyond belief guys. The hottest guy I could find was a tattooed-head-to-toe gypsy, who fathered two children of mine, only to let himself get murdered in our new mansion (I shouldn't have to protect you, husband, get with it) and get my kids taken away in the process, so, ugh. I just hope this is a character MY character can have sex with marry, not someone I have to play as. I take great pride in my Amazonian, blue-vein covered warrior women, okay? Finally, a proper male counterpart! Alex just wasn't doing it, you know? My marriage to Lady Grey is much happier, despite her being both a woman and ghost.

Hat Tip: @Sunrisepromo
Moar Info from G4 See full post

The Losers: Inconsequential Fun At Its Best

As a new fan of The Losers, which I picked up specifically so I'd be properly prepped for the film adaptation, out today, I was nervous, but hopeful, about Sylvain White's take on the Diggle/Jock collaboration. But just a few minutes into the opening sequence and I was sold. Light on emotional involvement, but heavy on light shoot-em-up fun, The Losers is a solid good time at the movies.

Beginning with the event that propels the Losers into the adventure that opens the comic, we see right off the bat that true, this is no frame for frame remake, but thank goodness for that fact. White's adaptation manages to turn the first volume of The Losers into a concise, well told, easy to follow tale, while losing none of the high octane action or proper development of the characters. If anything, we get to know the presumed dead crew even more in the film than we do during the read of the first volume and feel more connected to them as a unit thanks to the fantastic chemistry all six actors have with each other. Loving the characters so much on the page, it was a true delight to see them interacting in the flesh with such familiarity & ease.

There's Clay, played stoically and sexily (just me? nomnom) by Jeffrey Dean Morgan, the leader, who has no one and nothing but his Losers, Idris Elba's intimidating explosives expert, Rouqe, the last guy on the face of the planet you'd ever want to get into a disagreement with, Pooch, played with an undeniable sweetness by Columbus Short, the lighthearted transportation specialist with the most to lose, Cougar, the silent but deadly sniper (with only about 4 lines, Oscar Jaenada manages to make Cougar possibly more captivating & intriguing than any other character) and Jensen, the tech guy, played masterfully by Chris Evans with spot on comic timing, who goes through enough geek t-shirts to clothe an army. The x factor in the group is Zoe Saldana's Aisha, the badass who may or may not have a heart, who comes to the Losers with a mission that, should they choose to accept it, may save the world, but also may result in an early experation date for them all...and also may be a crock of shit to begin with.

The script does a nice job of adding enough elements to keep the suspense alive for readers of the comic without straying too far from the story and only dips into the cheese in one or two, blink and you miss it, moments.

That is, unless we're dealing with the main villain of the story, Max, played by Jason Patric doing his best Nic Cage impression. Or maybe that was just me wishing it was Cage chewing the scenery instead. Patric's attempt is a brave one, very hit or miss, unfortunately, for me, it was mostly a miss. His Max is almost...too creepy, too without a care, too glib, too mean. He comes across less an actual villain and more a troubled guy playing dress up. The elements for genius are all there - ridiculous lines (including one jab at an unusually short business partner which is one of the few moments that works for Patric), an unexplained scarred left hand, constantly covered by a glove, and a bridging on non-sensical quest for world domination and gosh does Patric try to do the part justice. Instead, most of his scenes are, simply put, cringe-worthy. I found myself just wishing they'd cut back to the Losers themselves as quickly as possible. But Patric really is the only weak link in terms of performances.

The actors, perfectly cast to such a degree that their resemblence to the drawn figures is almost frightening, totally embody their characters. My personal favorite was Chris Evans. Jensen is easily the most quotable of the film and I could do nothing but smile every time he opened his mouth. Or dropped his pants. ... You'll see. I am now somehow even more excited for his turn as Lucas Lee in Scott Pilgrim this summer, which, let me tell you, I didn't think was possible.

Overall, the film is fun, cool, often hilarious, at times nail-bitting and a wholly good time at the movies. Granted, I never felt particularly...emotionally connected to anything in the film, which is what prevents it from crossing over from good to great, but I also didn't miss it very much. Not every movie can be genre-elevating and that's okay with me. The Losers is a well done adaptation of a solid comic and a guaranteed enjoyable movie going experience. Chris Evans alone is worth the price of admission, but luckily you also get 5 other top notch performances, a lot of great action, and if you haven't read the comic, hopefully you'll walk away with the impetus to pick up the first volume.

Grade: B

Other Losers related posts:
Coverage of Wondercon Panel, from Loquaciousmuse
Interview with the cast at Wondercon, from Eruditechick See full post

Lost Makes Me Cry For The 5th Week In a Row. Record?

My personal highlights from episode 6x13, The Last Recruit

It's so nice to have everyone back together again.

Its over and we're all going to be okay

We'll never be apart again, I promise you

It doesn't feel right leaving the Island. We were brought here because we're supposed to do something. If that thing wants us to leave, maybe he's afraid of what will happen if we stay. The island is not done with us yet.
I like you

Plus Kate's plea to Claire totally made me cry. Not as much as the Jin/Sun reunion cause, HELLO, but still. So many tears. And Hurley's Star Wars reference was perfection. Oh, and I love this show.

See full post

American Idol Top 7 - Let's Just Call It For Crystal Now, Yeah?

Wow. Well that was a terrible episode of Idol, wasn't it? Thank god Lost and Glee were in top form tonight. Damnit, Idol.

Casey James - Don't Stop by Fleetwood Mac
Sigh. He's cute, but the performance is boring and the same old same old. He sounds good, he looks good and his guitar is awesome, but I always just think about Back to the Future when I see when perform now. Thanks Huey Lewis song. Except when he sang Jealous Guy. Do that again.
Step backwards.
Randy - Complains we see the same thing every week, needs something else, something different
Ellen - Great guitar playing, you have to be GREAT and he is consistently good but no one will be talking about that tomorrow
Kara - Praises Jealous Guy. Calls tonight's performance "Jam Band," making himself like everyone else, but she still believes in him
Simon - Didn't think it was inspiring, zero emotion, just stood there & sang the song pretty much like the original. Lazy song choice

Lee Dewyze - The Boxer by Simon & Garfunkel
Lee's high in honor of 4/20! What, he's not? Oh, that's just how he always looks? Cool. Our room got quite nervous when we heard he was The Boxer, cause we love this song. His vocal is all over the place, but you can tell he loves the song, which is kind of sweet. So I didn't hate it. Does anyone else get the impression that he doesn't have a lot of experience with women? Just saying. He has virginal face. Hmm. He's kinda hot. But that's neither here nor there. OR IS IT?
Step sideways - backwards for me, forwards for the judges
Randy - This season, the show is about artists and he's a great artist ready to make great music
Ellen - Beautiful song choice, soul & depth to him that we are seeing more and more of, better and better from him
Kara - Thinks he had his "moment" tonight. (We don't agree.) Advice - keep picking things you connect to
Simon - Best performance of the night! Of two. ... Sincere, emotional, inspirational, made it sound like it was written a week ago, absolutely brilliant

Tim Urban - Better Days by the Goo Goo Dolls
My is he pretty. Oh the notes that are off! Look at them go! I thought it worked for like a half second, but then he went back to being classic Tim, full of suck again. Valiant effort, sure, but his voice JUST ISN'T THAT GOOD.
Step backwards
Randy - Okay/good karaoke, didn't do anything with it
Ellen - Have liked his soup before, but didn't today
Kara - Found lane, he's in it, but a new Tim, but where he belongs (what are you saying?) but execution wasn't great but sometimes commercial but wasn't his best performance
Simon - If this was his first performance, they'd be quite impressed. Confused about who he is and thinks this week was a step too high, but he has improved over the weeks. But a little bit of a letdown.

Aaron Kelly - I Believe I Can Fly by R Kelly
I laughed when he first came on camera to sing. I laughed out loud. Because he looks little and silly and I want him to go home. He starts out sounding pretty shitty, then it gets moderately less shitty, technically, in some points, but WOW don't I care. Ugh. Just go home already. Poor man's David Archeleta INDEED.He could sing your face off, High School Student Aaron Kelly. Best part is the end, but it's still an annoying karaoke stupid arrangement poop.
Step backwards UCK
Randy - Good job with a giant song
Ellen - Big voice, tough song, handled it real good [sic]
Kara - Hit it in the middle and got it flying, by the end, he got there
Simon - A MAN OF REASON. Knowing him, liking him, having the guts to take the song on, he gave it his all. But in the real world, if it came on the radio, he would turn it off in 10 seconds cause it wasn't very good. He kind of made it good.

Siobhan Magnus - When You Believe by...don't know don't care but Mariah and Whitney sang it TOGETHER so WHY are you singing it. She explains that she just wanted to sing it, so why should she stop herself just because Whitney and Mariah sang it. Look. I saw the list of song choices this week and there were MUCH better options than this stupid ass song. She sings it half on, half off, all awkward. I loved Siobhan, so I don't wanna give up hope yet and her high notes were gorgeous. But...oh that was just awful. Who IS she as an artist?
Step backwards
Randy - Arguably picked the toughest song of the night. Was okay.
Ellen - More confirmation why she's here
Kara - Technically, really well sung, but it's not a musical and it started to feel very dramatic and starts to feel like she'd rather hang out with her than buy her record
Simon - Not the right song, old fashioned arrangement, too much happening too quickly, doesn't like the leaves/butterflies. (Siobhan rambles on about not being afraid of singing the song and blah blah, get better please NOW)

Michael Lynche - Hero by Nickelback
LOVE the opening with Big Mike and the guitar! This is nice! I love his voice and it's refreshing to hear someone actually hit all the notes! WOW!!! This is very Seal, isn't it? The cord progression even reminds me of Kissed by a Rose.
Step sideways - Didn't improve, didn't get worse
Randy - Was nervous for him, but it worked out
Ellen - Did a great job
Kara - Not her favorite performance, all over the place, song was unrecognizable
Simon - Sang it pretty well, but why did he sing about Spiderman? (Love Big Mike's reaction to all of this) Thought he was sensational last week, so this week didn't quite gel, but thinks he will stick around to next week

Crystal Bowersox - People Get Ready by The Impressions
Damn this girl is ballsy. A Capella opening followed by BAM in your face SINGING, actually ditching an instrument and just fuckin going for it. I mean, yeah, there's no question, let's just give her the trophy now and spend the rest of the reason creating fun duets, combining seasons. Or just invite Kris Allen back to be dreamy, siiiiiigh. Oh also, the ending emotion was effing awesome and proved me right that the clips from their performances are from dress rehearsal, kthxbye
Step Forward
Randy - That is how you do it, unbelievable, standing O
Ellen - Have never looked more beautiful, keep evolving and growing and getting better and better (ZOMG she brought her own mic stand from home!)
Kara - Thanks her for taking a risk, on another level tonight, schooled all the other contestants
Simon - THAT was inspirational. Happy to see her emotional cause she has closed down, but they all felt that the song meant something to her and she sang it fantastically, in a different class from everything else they heard tonight

Only *one* step forward tonight. Wow. Good work, guys. I'm disgusted with myself for even watching this show at this point.

Top Three

Bottom Three

Who do I WANT to go home? Aaron. I'll also accept Tim. Who do I think WILL go home? I fear a surprise early exit from either Casey or Siobhan. I feel like Crystal, Mike and Lee are safe. We're really getting to it at this point - your guess is as good as mine.

Grade Em!
Crystal A
Mike B
Lee C+
Casey C
Siobhan C
Tim C-
Aaron Kelly D...I really fuckin hate this kid See full post

In Defense of Hit-Girl

Since Kick-Ass was released in theaters, there's been a lot of swirling hubbub about Hit-Girl- her place in cinema, her place in feminism, her place in the film. It's an interesting debate, since the space she's occupying is unique in Western cinema.

There is a wonderful article about the phenomenon of ass-kicking pre-pubescents over at a wonderful blog, The Mystery of Girl's Media, and I'm going to touch slightly on some of that here, but you should give it a read.

One of the comments about Hit-Girl's ease of disposing of other humans is that it seems indicative that she will become a serial killer. I don't think Hit-Girl is going to turn into a serial killer. Especially now that she's going to be acclimated to life as a normal kid and has a supposedly strong father figure, who was her father figure before, who she trusts and loves and who apparently believes in the value and the power of the law (or else he wouldn't have stayed a cop). In the first place, serial killers aren't trained to be serial killers. They are innately serial killers. They're not carefully taught to torture animals and derive sexual gratification from torture and dismemberment. It's readily apparent in most case studies that there is something about a serial killer that is exceptional and usually off from a very early age. At no point are we shown that Hit-Girl has a built-in disdain for human life or a hatred for older men. She has a massive daddy complex, sure, but guess what: So do lots of girls.

She does, however, enjoy violence. But enjoying a bit o'the ol' ultra violence does not a serial killer make, not by default.

What's interesting about Hit-Girl is that she has ZERO sexuality. NONE. Even the winks and nods to male fantasy tropes amount to zero in effectiveness because she doesn't have it, it's not there. The blown kiss, the school girl uniform. She's not cashing in on the lust of the men around her, she's using her own guilelessness to make them uncomfortable or lure them into underestimating her.  The doorman doesn't let her in to screw her, he lets her in so she can use his phone to find her mommy and daddy. They don't want to do her, they want to pat her on the head and give her a cookie, or shoo her away. She doesn't count, until she's stabbing them.

Back to a prior talking point, she enjoys violence, something girls, especially little ones, aren't supposed to do. People are up in arms over a little girl using that language and liking weapons and being violent, but to be honest, I think that's better than the picture she herself painted (over sundaes with her dad at the bowling alley) of an alternate 11-yr old's reality. One where she wants to own and idolizes Bratz dolls, and is taught through Miley Cyrus videos that the best thing to be is sexy and available to boys. A girl is just as likely to become a hooker from playing with Bratz dolls as she is a serial killer from playing violent video games- in fact, the social imperative to bombard girls with images that tell her she is supposed to be hyper sexualized make the former a much more likely prospect than the latter.

Album cover
and Nickelodeon

I've been babysitting a girl from age 7 to age 9 and I have tremendous difficulty dealing with that aspect of her world. That said, while, yes, killing people is bad, in the grand scheme of morality, I sorta think it's cooler to be killing violent drug users in your teen years than getting pressured into having sex or doing sexual acts with boys. ...have I mentioned lately that I'm completely well balanced and normal? I am. I swear.

Interesting fact 3: She hasn't been sexually abused. In WESTERN cinema, I would challenge you to find a young girl fighter character, particularly one who ever dons a school girl uniform to kill people, who wasn't either sexually abused or the object of sexual desire for her mentor. Yes, Hit-Girl has been abused, by having her childhood replaced by grueling, painful, dangerous training at the hands of an obsessed father. However, he has real affection for her. They drink hot chocolate with marshmallows. And he isn't sexually interested in her. Leon in the Professional is kind to Mathilda, but wants her, though he is a moral enough person not to act on the desire. Big Daddy does not think of Mindy in those terms, which is a revolutionary aspect to that character outside of, well, Japan, and even Japanese school girl killers are largely fetishized (see: Kite).

The biggest problem with the character is that the film is constructed in a way that has the audience too busy cheering her on for anyone to mourn how tragic she is. There just isn't time, and even if there were, it's all a bit candy colored and kinetic for it. A half a scene with her ex-legal guardian telling Big Daddy something we already know- this isn't a childhood, and Mindy deserves one- doesn't quite do the trick. We're watching a little girl who's been turned into murderer hack'nslash her way across the kind of ordinance Spike Spiegel would have had difficulty with. But I was reveling in the action of it, not heartsick over what she was going through. So it's an interesting push and pull.

Ultimately, Hit-Girl has created a template for future girl fighters- ones that aren't being grabbed, groped, oggled. Ones that don't kill men after they've attempted rape, but just because it's their job, or their opponent is a bad guy.  It may be charged with all kinds of controversy, but the fact that Hit-Girl's character, power, and appeal doesn't revolve around her or anyone else's sexuality is in fact the biggest step a female action hero (or anti-hero, or participant, in the least) has taken in some time.

Stop back in three days, when we talk about why The Losers was fun but Aisha was a wasted opportunity. See full post