Tuesday, December 2, 2008

david abuses his power [fanboy strikes]

to clarify an earlier post:

WHEN dark knight ISN'T nominated for best picture, it will not be because of any sort of "bradley effect" (god i hoped we were done with that term), but because it isn't a particularly great movie. it will be because the narrative - elements of which realize their potential to often stunning effect - is largely an unwieldy mess that needed an academic, robert mckee brush-up or five. because the last 50 minutes of the movie are merely a parade of dime-store psychology masked as transparently as the eponymous superhero who incites them. because the action scenes feel either unnecessary (hong kong) or incoherent (impostor batmans, the final fight) or... are sort of undeniably wonderful (opening sequence, the truck scene). i gots to love the ambition and most obviously the truly genre-validating performances, but this movie is... here it comes... you're not gonna like this ms muse... i can barely type it... aclkkkkdf..... themostdeeplyflawedmovieofchristophernolan'scareer OKAY THERE IT IS. i mean, the man's got quite a track record so that ain't saying much, and he's never gonna make a film as blithely unaware of it's own superfluity as his insomnia remake... but THAT JUST HAPPENED.

anndddd a few other things - benjamin button is not "supposed" to be anything other than what it is... but the academy might not see it that way. and about academy members poo-pooing superhero movies? PUH-LEASE like i'm stefanie tanner. effin return of the king won 13 oscars. the movie about orcs, elves, and little people with really hairy feet and a villain that was kinda sorta a collection of enormous facial features... SWEPT the oscars. on a completely unrelated note, that movie was actually toottallly WICKED! (as said by that excited little kid from the incredibles).

also, ms muse gets -2 points for saying entertainment weekly is her favorite anything except for thing to read on the toilet. which i guess is vaguely synonymous with "magazine." so maybe that's fair.

so the score (for those of you keeping track at home) is david: 0. ms muse: -2.

don't worry, team muse - it's early in the season. but given how i am officially anointing myself "keeper of the score," things are not looking good for you.

and in the unlikely event that dark knight actually gets nominated, not only will i do trash for a month, but i will actually provide detailed evidence to support my opinion. sorry!

p.s. upon further consideration ms muse gets 2 pts. for her lovely and agreeable post on let the right one in... so we're allllll tied up again.


LoquaciousMuse said...

return of the king doesn't count. amazing films, huge technical achievements, based on classic books, epic, huge cast, PLUS it rewarded the final film for the whole trilogy, all 9 hours of it. i love lotr as much as the next geek, and its win was a huge step in the right direction, but academy members didn't see it as a superhero film, which is VERY different from epic fantasy film.

also hong kong was awesome! and i didn't start with the bradley effect business, that was other david! from ew!


stay tuned readers. it's on!

david said...
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LoquaciousMuse said...

i do agree that in a stronger year, dark knight may have been shut out, but im thinking now it has a chance! also watched some of the dvd last night that i somehow mysteriously own already! :) smileyyy faaacee and damn is that movie good.

also, your mom is 9 hours long AND YOUR FACE. i said it. golden globe nominations are announced next week arent they? GAH

david said...

just keep in mind that if dark knight gets nominated for a golden globe it's because EVERYTHING gets nominated for a golden globe! there are literally 3943 best pic nominees across the two categories.