Crap, started late. I accidentally drank 2 margaritas...
8:28 Zac Efron just checked out Hayden's boobs. Hardcore.
8:29 Gabriel Byrne? Buhhhhhhhhhhh. DON DRAAAAAAPER
8:30 Love that Quinto....mmm
8:30 Everyone in the room with me LOVES Sally Field
8:31 GO JANUARY
8:31 Anna Paquin wins. Saw that coming. Sigh. THEY'RE DATING IN REAL LIFE
8:33 Anne Hathaway & Meryl Streep talking about their tie at the Critics Choice Awards! Awez
8:34 david screams really loudly because Tobey Zigler was in the trailer for Last Chance Harvery
8:36 TwoEightOneFour: he just CARRIED HIS DRINK ON STAGE
8:37 HE DID TELL HER THAT! EXTRAS!!!
8:39 Dear god, I love Happy Go Lucky
8:39 Jonas Brothers. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. TowEightOneFour & david wonder what happens when they travel without each other. Do they suffer from withdrawl? Do they turn into vapors?
8:41 Wall-E! david: What are the odds?!
8:41 TwoEightOneFour & david are in a fight cause...I'm not sure why. Something about Bolt.
8:43 SALLY HAWKINS, YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.
8:44 Sally has a moment with Meryl! I die inside. HEART.
8:45 I'm in love with Sally
8:46 TwoEightOneFor is also in love with Sally. And he likes men.
8:47 Amanda Seyfried is either appauled or amazed. Marisa Tomei is also in love. EVERYONE IS IN LOVE.
8:47 Everyone announcing that Supporting Actor is coming up makes me tear up
8:47 david: I'M BEING TREATED FOR RHUMETOID ARTHRITIS WITH ORENCIA
8:48 david is lying
8:50 30 Rock was amazing last week. PETER DINKLAGE
8:51 david insults Heroes. We all chuckle.
8:52 I prepare for the Benny Button clip
8:53 Benny Button makes me tear up
8:53 Drew Barrymore's hair needs to be shot
8:54 david: Are they gonna make out?
8:54 david is upset that he doesn't know what Cranford is
8:54 P Diddy "acts" and we laugh. A lot.
8:55 david says John Adams is SO gonna win.
8:55 Tom Wilkinson is dubbed "T Wilkes Booth"
8:56 John Adams SO wins
8:57 david has taken over. demi moore is nominated for least interesting person alive.
8:58 this is duh city for heath.
8:59 LQ is crying. david just needs a little push... out the window. but jeez, heath was too good for this movie.
9:00 heath ledger DIED!??!!
9:01 ... too soon?
9:01 LQ hits self for reasons that shall go unexplained. observes that cameraman is trying to find anyone with an emotional reaction. that man with all the numbers is missing some beard.
9:04 that arrogant fios d-bag just carries his award with him everywhere he goes... jerk.
9:05 frost / nixon... adequacy at 24fps.
9:06 that was a schemeplay.
9:07 LQ says delightful in bruges and i say in bruges? more like... in boos!
9:08 boooooo ive loved you so long booo city!
9:09 waltz with bashir. nice. though im dying to see gomorrah. whatever, so many deserving films were predictably overlooked. LQ is freaked out by how much ari folman looks like his animated self. and pretty sure he just called all of his partners autistic, and his award his "christ."
9:10 melikes the end of folman's speech.
9:10 an american crime came out like 9 years ago, i swears it. wow this category is more boring than a playoff football game. or any football game, really. i just realized i've sold both those presenters stuffs at work.
9:13 numbers boy says laura linney is a classy broad. in other news, someone needs to get me candy. stat.
9:14 LQ deeply regrets not having the live blog flow in the opposite direction. david is predictably indifferent. even though he was the one to first bring it up. strange how that works.
More after the jump
9:15 candy has been served. disaster averted.
9:16 ahhh eating snickers while watching the biggest loser ads...
9:17 i am officially over the office. 30 rock FTW
9:18 in bruges was worthless in almost every way... but it was very pretty. kind of made me want to spend some time in bruges. that's what the movie was going for... right?
9:19 what is up with seth rogen's voice? LQ wants to climb up on that.
9:20 boo slumdog. what a shame that the screenplay award is so early in the show. this snickers bar is waaayy better than slumdog millionaire. this snickers bar deserves its own live blog. im off to start work on that.
9:21 LQ takes over. She thinks her roommate Jen says that Patrick Dempsey & Amy Poehler should be dating and gets confused.
9:22 Amy maka me laugh. YAY ALEC BALDWIN.
9:23 P.S. LQ loved In Bruges. And TINA. Fey.
9:23 Did anyone see Alec Baldwin interact with Ryan Seacrest earlier? It was amazing.
9:24 TwoEightOneFour: WHY is she standing like that.
9:24 I'm gonna be pissed if Slumdog wins best picture. Everyone agrees that Patrick & Amy really should be dating
9:25 "Aperture Science. We do what we must. Because. We can."
9:25 TwoEightOneFour accuses david & LQ of having too much geek in one house
9:26 david tells TwoEightOneFour that everytime he or I says something geeky, our roommate Jen must have sex with a man.
9:27 Roommate Jen remembers the time we all watched porn together while she wrapped xmas presents. We have a good laugh.
9:27 There is chocolate all over david's sheets. Commercials are boring.
9:28 WHAT IS SHE WEARING WHY WHY WHY HER HAIR WHY HER DRESS HER BOOBS NO WHY WHY WHY
9:29 No one can think of answer to the previous question. We don't know why. Jen comments that she looks like a lampshade
9:30 Star of Transformers and disgraced former star of Iron Man
9:30 (david says) megan fox, you have the face of someone deeply obnoxious. and thus... you would be the deeply obnoxious mother of my children.
9:31 giammati wins... and i am not drinking any fucking merlot!
9:33 lego batman arrives.
9:34 there's a moon on normandy beach? 30 rock has this sooooo in the bag. remember that soderbergh movie with david fincher where duchovny wanted a happy ending to his massage? cause i don't.
9:35 now that dexter and his sister married, MLP and justin kirk are next.
9:37 pretty sure that tracy morgan is going to be thanking me momentarily.
9:39 i saw wendy and lucy today. it wasn't that funny.
9:40 i'm about to OD on orencia. wait, did they just say that orencia causes cancer?
9:42 pretty sure that mira sorvino also causes cancer. (formerly) HOT cancer.
9:42 fuck, i'm about to get mamma mia'd, aren't i?
9:44 um... diddy? puffy? whatever the fuck your name is? best soundtrack? yeah... not a category so much. kate beckinsale's fluttering upper lip agrees.
11:05 slumdog millionaire wins best picture. snore city.
9:45 I too don't like the Slumdog sweep that's happening. Gross. Also, Kate Beckinsale was upset that she had to present with P. Diddy.
9:46 David D. mentions his WIFE. AWKWARD. TwoEightNumbers is afraid of Jane Krakowski's neck
9:47 We feel bad for Christina Applegate and can't figure out the word for Mastectomy and it gets awkward for a little bit
9:48 david: HOW IS THIS AWARD AFTER BEST COMEDY?
9:48 omg tina and amy and will are fraaaynnndsss!
9:49 OH TINA, do it.
9:50 Everyone in this audience loves Tina. No one could possibly hate Tina. Tina is making up that people hate Tina. CAUSE NO ONE HATES TINA.
9:51 david: "Everyday I ride the buuusss." he is singing and it upsets me
9:51 david turns on Still Alive by GLaDOS
9:52 An ad for the Blackberry Storm comes on and we get really angry because not only does that phone SUCK but the ads suck even more
9:52 numbers man accuses Angelina of being a homewrecking vampire queen. I however, think her kiss with brad is adorable. BRAD AND ANGIE, RAISE ME RIGHT NOW ITS OKAY THAT I'M 22!!! ... Is that creepy? NO. ?. LQ out.
9:54 numbers man and I are officially drunk
9:55 david: martin scorsese is wearing January Jones' eyebrows
9:55 Spielberg ain't done yet, ya'll
9:56 Reasons to love Spielberg: He is Jewish. He has a beard. He has a son named Max.
9:57 Also because I love his movies. This is my favorite montage ever.
9:57 Jaws - clap. Encounters - clap. ET - clap & squeal. Color Purple - big BOOO from david. he doesn't like black people. Empire - clap. Mini Christian Bale! Jurassic Park - BIG WOO OMG I LOVE THIS MOVIE THE MUSIC OMG. Amistad - Eh. Schindler - Silent Admiration. Saving Private Ryan - david - good movie. LQ - Shakespeare in Love was better. AI - My boyfriend is happy right now. Minority Report - A rousing YES. Catch Me if you Can - Another rousing YESSSS. Munich - Good movie. Indiana Jones - Blood Curdling YES.
10:00 Where is Hook, I swear to god.
10:00 No Hook. Poor form.
10:00 He executive produced the best movies ever
10:01 They show Tom Cruise & Drew Barrymore! Awe! But not Ralph Finnes or Tom Hanks? Anna Paquin looks lovingly at her british vampire boytoy
10:02 His inspiration is Scorsese! Awwwweee
10:03 numbers man's first movie was Hook. Awwwwee.
10:04 numbers man wonders why there is an Emmy on top on top of the golden globe
10:06 Loving this mentor stuff. david uses the word "extemporaneously" and i get confused. Then I learn what it means. I'm sure Spielberg wrote this and semi memorized it. Cause he is amazing. Wait. Is he speaking extemporaneously?
10:07 Spielberg hasn't worked with Meryl Streep, has he?
10:08 Good speech, good speech. Robert Downey Jr. is sexy.
10:08 Group sing along to the Target commercial
10:11 the blackberry bold, as beautiful as it is powerful... by which they mean ugly. ps david resumes control.
10:12 david prefers his phone without a clitoris on the middle of it. though he isn't quite sure why.
10:13 is dustin hoffman available as a pet?
10:14 best director... weak, weak, fincher, weak, mendes. danny boyle. bah.
10:16 okay... the dude who played the game show host in SM is admittedly awesome.
10:16 sigourney weaver... i hope she talks about how she gets her hair done with my mom. what? revolutionary road? fine.
10:18 sandra bullock. retire from life. thanks.
10:19 james franco! come on franco. oh, in bruges. you were pointless. LQ thinks otherwise, but LQ's favorite hobby is being wrong.
10:20 david wonders why the eff Loquacious Muse becomes LQ... but thems be the breaks.
10:21 love... is ignorance's nemesis. right. think colin ferrell has been hanging out with mickey rourke circa 1985.
10:26 We notice how many breasts Salma Hayek has. Many.
10:27 david thinks Salma Hayek should have played the little girl in The Fall
10:27 Yes, I realize Loquaciousmuse should be LM but I think LQ more. So shove it.
10:28 Oh Sascha. He's going there.
10:29 The audience pretends they care about Madonna
10:30 Sexy luscious Vicky Cristina wins. I loves this movie. Except for most of ScarJo.
10:30 The guy on stage next to Penelope Cruz may be about to pull a gun from his jacket
10:31 Where are ALL the other actors from Vicky Cristina?
10:31 Who did Angelina just salute to? Did Kate Winslet just ask Tom Cruise why he is so crazy? Do they know each other? HOBNOBBING.
10:34 四泊低落幕のトマスらに慣らしにはらし肉間の小瀬寿はなく浜 - david is back.
10:36 WHAT IS HIS TIE
10:36 according to LQ, cameron diaz is officially too little.
10:38 ahhhhh PTSD from the HAPPENING!
10:39 YES. KATE WINSLET. REV ROAD! nice. this movie was criminally under-loved. and i can call it REV ROAD, which makes me sound very industry hip. and isn't that what we all aspire to be? yes, angelina jolie is THE OTHER ONE. she's like the barack obama of the golden globes.
10:41 okay, there's late, and then there's LATE. richard yates, this shit's almost over, you should really hurry up.
10:41 wait, he's DEAD!?!?
10:42 ... too soon?
10:42 Leo is SO IN LOVE with Kate Winslet. WOAH. PS LQ is back.
10:42 That was amazing. I love you, Kate. I also love you, Blake & Rainn.
10:44 GO MAD MEN!
10:44 My mother calls david names in the comments section and I laugh
10:44 MAD MEN! YAY!
10:45 Guys, I can't stop thinking about how much Kate & Leo love each other and how awkward it must be for Sam Mendes. Woah. Tonight, Sam is gonna wanna go home early but Kate is gonna wanna stay and hang out with Leo and they are gonna have a moment and Leo is gonna get drunk and be like "Kate, I have to...I love you so much" and she will be like "I love you too, dear" but then he is gonna be like "No, I'm IN love with you. So in love with you." And then she is gonna be like omfg in her head but won't be able to say anything because Leo would have already started kissing her. I think I just started writing some Kate & Leo fanfiction. It's 1997. I have to go.
10:50 GO MICKEY GO MICKEY
10:50 YES YES YES YES YES YES YES
10:51 david asks why Bruuuuuce is married to Kathy Griffen and twoeightonefour revokes david's speaking privileges
10:51 Did Mickey & RDJ do drugs together back in the day?!?!?!
10:52 The audience loves david unger. twoeightonefour notices that Mickey has the same scarf as the guy from India, but is wearing it correctly.
10:53 MIDDLE FINGER! NICE. HAHA CENSORS.
10:54 Axl Rose! Good deed! I didn't know that! Lovely!
10:56 今晩わ david is back.
10:58 yikes, kings looks fantastically uninteresting.
10:59 t-crizzy! all right, either benny buttons or rev road. let's do this HFPA
11:00 didn't i call this like 90 minutes ago? or 5 minutes from now... depending on how ya look at it.
11:00 even my tv is pissed that slumdog won best picture. the dvr is going into sleep mode.